Valentine's Weekend: a photo essay

love of food

love of self 

(Ellie embraces her new-found curves and luscious hair)

love of art

love of spouse

love of family

Could there be a better Valentine's celebration?  No, there could not.

Birthday Party Re-cap

Well, as you all remember we had a birthday party for Eleanor back in December.  I could say that I'm sharing these photos for the benefit of friends and family who were not able to attend.  But in the spirit of full disclosure I'm going to admit that I'm putting these photos up because I put a lot of work into this party and if I don't blog it, it just feels wasted.  Twisted?  I know.  So here are some details and action shots from the rocking-est first birthday ever!

Menu items:  Cupcakes, sausage pinwheels, pierogis, veggie platter, lemon water.  Classy food for a classy girl.  I am not a cupcake master and thus will be purchasing them in years to come.

The Lee twins came to celebrate and I appreciated not only their attendance, but also that Bethany dressed to match the theme of the party.

 After the cupcake consumption, Ellie required an outfit change.

Uncle Carl and Aunt Becca stole the show with  THE perfect gift.  Ellie wouldn't let go of it all day.  She had places to go and people to see.

Seriously, do not try to take the stroller, even for a "best friends photo."

And here we have photographic evidence that I actually did attend my daughter's first birthday party.  Thanks Debi!  I'm the one on the left, kneeling with the giant camera.  I wonder if that is how Ellie will remember me - the person who ruined all the fun moments of her childhood by saying, "OK, now look over here."  "Just one more."

Aaaahh, I am my mother's daughter.  At the end of the day I think to myself, "Well, at least I got the photo."

A self-discovery (about myself)

I’m an all or nothing kind of girl. Is this good or bad?  I have no idea.  Is it healthy?  I have a long line of family history that tells me it’s not.  And yet, it remains the reality around here.  ALL or NOTHING.  Is it possible that two different people live inside my one body?

Figure 1:

Yesterday I did EVERYTHING, people!  I cleaned this apartment top to bottom.  The tub was shining (without help from Photoshop thank-you-very-much), the bed made, the baby’s clothes sorted and reorganized, the floors swept, the couch stains treated.  I bathed the baby, cooked homemade soup for dinner, planned a great Family Home Evening lesson, kissed the husband on my way out the door, picked up a sister from the ward, had people over for the previously mentioned FHE, and later collapsed in bed (still twitching from my manic day of accomplishing things)

Figure 2:

Today I felt tired from yesterday’s excitement.  So what did I do?  NOTHING.  I had a generous helping of valentine’s candy for breakfast (thanks Grandma Hardie), I scoured Hulu for anything remotely interesting and proceeded to watch it.  I read when I wanted to and napped when I wanted to.  I remained pajama clad and bra-less until 2pm (too much?)  The baby was clothed and fed proper meals, but she was also allowed to pull her step stool right up to the computer desk and watch all the TV she wanted.  What a transformation - yesterday I was June Cleaver and today I’m a bona fide sloth!

Conclusions:

1. Balance is not my strong point.

2. Being obsessive is exhausting. (for days afterward)

3. Kit-Kats for breakfast are guilt inducing but oh-so-good.

4. A little bit of crazy keeps life interesting. 

If you read this entire wordy post about me analyzing my inner self, you may now enjoy these photos of Eleanor covered in her dinner.

Please tell me that you're a little crazy too!

Virtual Window Shopping

Old Navy is having a huge sale right now on their baby clothes.  I love browsing online and dreaming of how cute Ellie will look in all kinds of different styles.  Here are some favorites.  It's true I have a thing for stripes - I do not deny it.

And now let us mourn the ones that got away.  I hesitated, and Ellie's size sold out of the adorable styles below.  The internet lets out a collective sigh.

Ellie's first (play)date

She's a little bit country, he's a little bit rock'n'roll - and this is a story about how they fell in love.

Ellie had her first date back in October.

She was very excited, but also a little frantic.

Mom, he's so great and I just want everything to be perfect!

 She ran around like crazy cleaning the house before he came.

Finally I made her sit down a take a moment to center herself.

I was worried her nerves would be shot before the young man even arrived.

Imagine my concern when this handsome, rebellious face appeared at my front door.

I allowed him in, and it was obvious that Ellie was mad for him.

They spent the afternoon together: sharing toys, having adventures, just being close generally.

Pretty soon, though, things started to get a little hot and heavy between them.

And when Ellie asked me to give them some privacy, I had to put my foot down.

Isaac, I can see your feelings for my daughter are very strong, but we have rules in this house.

 They didn't cool off, so I had to ask Isaac to leave.

Eleanor was distraught - but I'll not have my daughter engaging in immoral behavior.

I told her there would be other boys.

 I don't want any other boys - I only want him!

I know she wants him, and secretly, I want him for her as well. 

In fact, I plugged their photos into a program that tells you what your baby might look like.

Now, is that a cute future grand-baby or what!

 

Snowed In

I love waking up just a few moments before a snowstorm.  It's gray and ominous outside.  I perch myself on the loveseat and take a few moments to read, pausing occasionally to look out the window at everyone scurrying around, desperate to reach their destinations before the heavens open.

It's a magical feeling on those mornings.  Especially since the overcast skies trick Ellie into thinking it's still night time and I get a few extra minutes to myself.  Then the first few flakes start to fall and I find myself tucked away in a snow globe - cozy and warm and thankful that I have no need to venture out.

Day three of this snowy-time adventure finds me in a little different mindset, however.  Full blown cabin fever!  This morning I was standing in the windowsill with my head sticking out the top of the window, just breathing in the cold air.  "There is a world out there," I tell myself.  I can feel the craziness creeping in and I'm sure it's apparent to any neighbors who happen to look up and see a pajama-clad woman sticking her bed head out the window just to feel the sensation of wind in her hair.

It's starting to feel a little claustrophobic, and so today I've made the decision:  I am going out.  Even if just for a stroll around the block with a bundled Ellie strapped to my chest, we are out of here!  This little trip is just the cure to my cabin fever in one of two ways:

1.  I will feel so refreshed and invigorated after walking around in the cold air, that I'll know I made the right choice to get out and get my blood pumping.

OR

2. It will be such a miserable experience trudging through the slushy sidewalks riddled with dog poop and unexpected puddles, that I'll run back to the shelter of my apartment with a renewed understanding of why I never take Ellie out in the snow.

Either way, bye bye cabin fever.

Hiding Out

Who, me?  Hiding from my blog?  Hiding from my faithful (though tiny) readership?  Never.

Guess where I found Ellie hiding when we were supposed to be heading for playgroup?

Okay, so I have been absent from this space for a while.  Mostly for very justifiable reasons.  There was a weeks long vacation to Utah, we all had illnesses to recover from upon our return, things like that.  But there is one reason I've been gone of which I'm ashamed.  I've let myself feel overwhelmed by my little blog.  

Do you know the feeling?  You had a list of things to blog about, you got too busy, now it feels too late, you have writer's block, you're out of practice, you've lost the habit, everyone else posts cooler things than you do.  The list goes one and on for me.  But it stops today!  No reason to feel overwhelmed - this is my fun fun fun creative outlet.  And if it's not fun then there is no point to it.  Sorry for that rant, I just needed to remind myself publicly that this is my blog and I will post when I want to.  (Any thoughts on fighting the self-imposed pressures of blogging?)

And today I want to.  I'm coming out of blog hiding.  Just to prove how out of hiding I am, I think I will post my New Year's resolutions for the whole internet to read.

I took a refreshing break from New Year's resolutions a couple years ago, and I feel it's time to go back.  But I'm not the obsessive goal driven accomplish-er I used to be.  The more relaxed me sets a yearly theme, with a few bullet points to guide my direction.  This year's theme is:

Live with purpose.

Live with joy.

Everday.

• Nourish my marriage
• Teach Eleanor everyday
• Be a conscientious visiting teacher
• Take a course to further prepare myself for ASL interpreting
• Explore more vegetarian meals
• Pay off a lot of student debt
• Cultivate meaningful relationships with family members

I think it will be a great year as I really focus on doing things that bring joy and take the time to enjoy whatever it is I'm doing.  What are some of your New Year's resolutions?

 Ellie has vowed to spend  more time in the tub, obviously.